Testimony Dance!

I have found it so encouraging how my last blog update has been used to bless so many people in this last week. In all honesty, it was completely unexpected! I guess the times when you don't have a lot to say are the times God uses to say exactly what people needed to hear. For this update there a just a few things I wanted to share. The first thing was a statement that my lecturer said in class today. We call him Topi Papa because his last name is too hard to pronounce as well as he is teaching us about the Father heart of God this week so calling him "Topi Papa" is fitting. Anyway! One thing he said to today that really stood out to me was "When we (believers) don't get scared, the enemy gets scared." This stood out to me because recently my heart has been desiring to become a really strong warrior for Christ but the thing that holds me back more than anything else is doubt and fear. So! When times are rough or seem like everything is falling apart, don't get scared. Have faith in God's timing and know that the more you trust God, the more nervous the enemy gets! WOO! The Second thing I wanted to share with you was something that REALLY encouraged me. Last Tuesday we were given our first dance assignment as most of you know. That assignment was to take part of our testimony and choreograph it into a three minute dance. Well! Today, we performed those dances for the first time. And let me start off by saying, I am in SUCH a talented class of people. The dances were incredible and everyone's stories were amazingly told! But what was so encouraging to me was the feedback and suggestions my classmates gave me after my dance. Everyone who gave feedback all told me that throughout my dance, they could see my passion for acting and a lot of them encouraged me by telling me they see my gift I have in that area. That BLEW my mind!!! The fact that I am not even doing acting right now and yet people still see my love and heart for it makes me feel so much more confident in the fact that acting is ultimately where God wants me after this DTS is over. And I am just so excited to see what that is going to look like when that time comes! HOWEVER! On top of being encouraged in the fact that people can see my love and passion for acting, they also challenged me to make sure I don't use my "acting abilities" as a crutch when it comes to dancing. They encouraged me to take a step forward and have faith in my dancing skills in this time as well and to develop those skills in a way I haven't ever done before as well! So while I was still always use acting to help tell all my stories, I am excited to learn how to make that a controlled decision; not just a crutch when I "don't know what dance move to use"! So yeah! It was a super good day! And finally, for my family. Tonight we had a worship night and long story short, I got up and told my whole M.A.D. school about the situation at hand and everyone came together and touched me as a representative for the family and everyone out loud just cried to God praising Him and thanking Him and asking Him for healing in every aspect of everything going on. It was so powerful and I just want you all to know that that praying isn't stopping and God is going to do an AMAZING miracle through this situation! I love everyone! Thank you guys for reading, praying, and supporting me. I am finally loving it here and for the first time, this week I have comfortably been able to say i'm not ready to come home yet AND that right now, these people are my family. God is blessing me through the good and the bad and your prayers have a LOT to do with it! So thank you! With Love, Christianna!

God is Good

In all honesty, I don't have really anything to update you all on. I just kind of wanted to take a moment to tell you about a small story and little lesson a good friend of mine helped me realize today. Today started off roughly because of difficult news I found out from back home. While I was skyping my mom and dad back home, a friend of mine kind of overheard and just saw that something was going on so he asked me about it. After sharing it with him he took the time to pray over my family and I and then he promptly gave a book and took me to a specific chapter that literally talked about the exact situation I had just shared with him. I carried the book around with me all day and never really had enough time to read it. I wound up having a good day despite some of the hard emotions I was having but during lunch this friend of mine still just hugged me pretty much until the tears started to actually happen. He didn't even say anything but the sentiment of how much he cared impacted me a lot. Anyway! Later this evening I was sitting outside the cafe here on base waiting for it to open and decided to read that chapter my friend gave me. The chapter was amazing and it encouraged me so much. After reading it I immediately sent the info about it to my mother to read when my friend (his name is Kane btw) walked up right then. So I told him I finally read it and I thanked him for it because of how encouraging it was. And while I thought that would be the end of the conversation, it wasn't. He kept talking to me and then I started asking questions... Little side-note and background info, he is an actor and has been in the industry and his perspective on acting and everything he has experienced since he got saved has been such an inspiration to me since the first day I met him. And he knows i want to be an actress. Back to the story. So while we are talking about all the stuff that my family has gone through and is now going through I was telling him how hard it is for me to bring it God because I have never gotten answers from Him about the reasons for why hard things keep happening. And I was telling him about how the most difficult thing for me about being here in Australia so far is not being able to be at home for my family. Especially when things like this happen. I am so grateful for my friend because he immediately brought truth into my life that no one has ever made clear to me before. And it made sense! He told me that Christian's so often get caught up in the "there's a reason for everything" and they neglect the fact that God didn't make these things happen. He allows them to happen and He then takes the hard things that end up happening and He turns them into good things eventually. Why? Because God is Good. And the fact of the matter is, I need to let go of my family and I need to allow myself to fully and truly trust that God IS taking care of my family. And He is and always will do a MUCH better job then I could ever even attempt to do. After all this I was feeling very emotional because I knew Kane was right and it was hard to accept but I was always grateful for his honesty and his encouraging words but I was trying to hold in my tears. And that brings me to the other lesson I learned tonight. Actors cannot allow their emotions to control them. In order to be successful, we have to accept our emotions and allow ourselves to vulnerable because they are the most believable actions an actor could do. And allowing yourself to cry, or be angry, or be happy, or be sad is also the best way we as humans can cope. So long as in the end we give everything back to God. So tonight I have learned, there isn't a "reason" for everything, but in the end it will be good because God is good; God is the one who takes care of my family, not me; As an actor, I have to allow myself to have emotions even in the times I don't want them. SO! That is my story. I am so grateful for God's love and provision and I am so grateful for the people He keeps placing in my life. I feel like I have a new older brother who i can easily go to when I need encouragement. So! The truth of the day?! GOD IS GOOD!

Well! My first week of MAD YWAM is almost over and already I am completely consumed with homework and assignments! It is crazy! It is amazing but LOTS of work. I always knew I would be grateful to Trinity and all the ridiculous amount of work they gave us in High School! It comes in handy now! I am very happy to say that life has just been looking up! God is really helping me to keep my focus on my time here in Australia rather than always thinking about home which sounds like it is harsh that I am excited about this, but it is actually a really good thing! Why?! Because I have been able to just stay focused on my personal relationship with God and that has been such a blessing and it will just continue to be life changing! I am so happy and excited to be able to say that! Today we were given our first assignment in dance and it is going to be hard. We have to take a small part of our testimony and turn it into a three minute choreographed dance. And we have one week to perfect it. It is a lot of work but I am SO excited to do it! I know that with God's help, inspiration, and guidance everyone's dances are going to be beautiful! It has been such a blessing to be able to use dancing freely as a type of worship. I love it! Anyway! Thank you everyone for always praying for me and thank you for supporting me! I should find out within the next month where my outreach will be! I am excited to share those results with all of you! But I also ask that you keep praying about supporting me because $$ is always a factor in the life of missionaries who literally live off of support. So if you would like to support or donate to me, go to one of my first blog posts and go to the bottom of the page and click the donate button in order to send money to my PayPal account. Thank you all so much again for your prayers. I continue to ask for them!! I love and miss you all! With love and Blessings, Christianna!!!

Testimonies

Hello Everyone! Thank you all for your prayers. The amount of emotions I have been feeling this week have been off the wall!!! They have been everywhere! I have had hard core lows and also hard core highs! Ultimately God has just been working on my heart non-stop and today I was incredibly encouraged because we spent the whole day sharing and listening to our testimonies. It was incredible! It was draining for sure because of all the emotions these stories bring out in the people sharing and in us who are listening. But God's provision in everyone's life is just beautiful! And I have really seen how blessed I am with my home life and my friends who surround me. You are all amazing and I am so fortunate with the life I have been given. So thank you to everyone who has been a part of making it so blessed. Anyway! In other news, I have found out that we do not have a system at my base where you can donate to me directly through the school. SO! If you would like to do so, you will have to do it through my PalPal which you will be able to do through any of my blog posts soon. The donate button will be on the bottom of the page and you can choose how much you would like to donate. Or, if you would like to write a check, you can just send that check to 3196 Willow Creek Rd. PMB 251, prescott Az, 86301 and my mother will put it directly into my bank account. Email me if non of these are the way you would like to donate and we can figure something out together! I have to turn in my next payment of about $2500 on November 15th. And honestly, I have NO idea how that payment is going to happen. That one or the final one of $2000 due two weeks later. Hearing some stories today, I know that God does and will provide the money! And honestly, i am just excited to see how He does that! There is never a boring part of living a dedicated life to God! He is truly just FULL of surprises! And I am slowly learning that it is best to try to enjoy those surprises. Even the difficult and unpleasant ones because in the end, it will always be for the best. Because His plan IS the best. And the journey getting there will be worth the struggles. For now I just ask for lots of prayers and for support. On top of my payments, I DO have to live which means I have to buy things too. It is unfortunate and SO hard only being able to wait and see if the money is there one day in your account and not being able to go work for it and KNOW it is there. God always provides and He always will, but it is HARD! Let's be honest. Not working in order to support yourself is not an easy thing. But it is humbling. So praise Jesus! Anyway! Thank you all again for reading my posts and having patience with my hard core mood swings lately and thank you SOOO much for praying for me! They ARE working and it is beautiful to be a part of! I miss everyone and pray for you all the be blessed! With Thanks, Christianna

Day 1: Prayers

Today was our official first day at MAD. It was Orientation all day. Just a LOT of listening. It was good and there was a lot of information to take in. Basically at this moment in time, I truly am excited to see where this journey is going to and I am excited to see how God is going to work in my life and in the lives of people around. Right now however, I ma feeling very lonely. I have been talking to tons of people and getting on a friendly basis with everyone, but there isn't any one person or two persons who I am connecting with and it is really bringing me down. I'd like to say that it is because i ma young. But EVERYONE here is young and I am definitely not the youngest so that's not an excuse. So far I DO seem to be the only who has never been away from home before so I am sure that is part of it. In fact I know it is. I am terribly homesick. Right now I just want to ask all of you to life me up in your prayers. I have never felt lonely before so I don't really know how to handle it. But I am doing my best. It is also very difficult dealing with the time difference from home. It's such a struggle to find time to talk to everyone there AND socialize with everyone here. And then, my final complaint for this "cheerful" blog, I am also officially stressing over money. I don't have any money and I need to turn in about $2500 by November 15th and another $2000 two weeks after that. PLUS I still need to be paying for my laundry and personal items. Basically to sum up my feelings right now, I am stressed, poor, and lonely and I need help. Help that I KNOW can only come from God but help that will come through prayers and support as well. (which are all gifts from God). I am sorry my posts haven't been the most uplifting and cheerful but I figured everyone would want me to be honest in my blog about how I am doing so that is what I am going to do. Thank you to everyone who has supported me so far and thank you for your prayers. I miss everyone. A lot. I will be praying for all of you too! Many blessings, Christianna

Thank You!

My last update was definitely a downer! There is no denying that! However, I am so happy and thankful for all the support and prayers I have received since then! And because of all your encouragement and with a few more days to actually get to know the area I am in, I am feeling a LOT better about everything! The day after I last posted, I went to my YWAM base where I got to meet majority of all my leaders and got a tour of the base. It was absolutely amazing. The people were so wonderful and loving and it was great meeting other people who also have come from the States. There are people there from Tuscon, California, Indiana, Kansas, and Colorado too! It was such a blessing to meet them and to hear their stories. But the best part was hearing about how much the LOVE it here in Australia. I know I am going to love it here as well but I also know my homesickness isn't going anywhere. But that will be the beauty of my growing relationship with the Lord while I am here. I know He is going to help me through all of this. So! YAY! I am getting excited and anxious to finally start my schooling! However, one thing I am not looking forward to is of course having to pay for my living. And YES, i DO know this is how it works in the adult life! Haha but I also know, it is FAR cheaper in America. Let's just say in the last 5 days, I have learned to REALLY appreciate my home and my country despite all our problems. :) Right now I just continue to ask for prayers and for support as this journey truly begins! Also keep praying for my father's health! He is doing a LOT better today but please pray it stays this way. He deserves to have an amazing visit too! Thank you all so much! The next time I update my blog, I will be moved in a ready to start my schooling at YWAM! Praise the Lord! I love you all and really appreciate you guys! You're all in my prayers as well!! AND remember! If you want to stay in personal contact with me either facebook message me or email me at chrissy.white1994@gmail.com

BLESSINGS! Christianna

I am here!

  So I arrived in Brisbane with my father safely on the 10th of October (yesterday) and basically this is going to be Christianna Honest Hour, it was the worst traveling experience of my life. My father wound up with a throbbing, horrible earache (which he still gets every now and then) and then, every stop I was slowly being cut off from the ones I love because I no longer have cell phone service AND the wifi keeps getting less and less. So, I have no way to talk to anyone. Once we finally got the Brisbane airport, we then spent about 2 hours trying to figure out how to get to our hotel. Eventually we figured it out! I was excited to get to the hotel because when we booked the room, they advertised for their free wifi....their free wifi that they get from the park across the street. The wifi that doesn't even work when you're directly IN the park. SO! Unless I am directly hooked up to the wifi cord in the hotel's computer section, I can't talk to anyone. And that has been the most lonely experience.
  I am beyond grateful to have my father here but lets be honest, the two of us together and alone has always been somewhat of a lost puppy situation. Anyway, once I was finally able to get in contact with my mom, she was able to ease up my horrible feelings a bit. After seeing that I had clearly been sobbing the entire trip, she told me not to feel stuck. If I absolutely need to come home, I can.
  I am in a hard place right now because while I feel a LOT better after getting good rest and experiencing a little more of Australia, I am still sickeningly homesick and so far, i can't shake it.
  Today I am going to go to the YWAM base and check it out which I have a feeling is going to help me out bunches! But for now, I really just ask for your prayers, your encouragement and for clarity for me. I want to stay and go through this once in a lifetime experience, but I also don't want to come home to the people I love more than anything. I need clarity. I need prayers.
  We always knew I was dramatic person... but the last 3 days, you should feel lucky you haven't had to deal with me ;D
  I love you all and I hope my next blog can be more chipper! Thank you for your support and prayers! I look forward to seeing the reason for why God put me through such heartache right now.
  THANK YOU!

with love,
Christianna <3